Sylvilel

Currently reading: Not sure what I think about this. A bit entertaining, but not much more than that. Something to put on the coffee table or by the toilet, I'd say. " Omgitt av idioter" Recently finished reading: A nice satirical piece for those of us who aren't really that into crime novels and local politics. Easy read with lots of dark humor. "Menn som hater ulver" Currently listening to: Currently watching: Current wordcount on The Great And Wonderful Novel: 15 693 / 80 000 words

©️Sylvilel I sometimes wish I had the guts to pack my things and travel the world. It's such a futile thing to say, because there really is nothing stopping me, not even insecurity anymore. I'm just - I don't know. Not afraid. Not nervous. Lazy? Maybe. I don't know what to call it. Anxious? Maybe that's a better word. Not bad anxious. Maybe I'm afraid that it won't be all I want it to be. If all goes to plan, I might be travelling to Copenhagen this Christmas. With a friend, visitng another friend. For some reason, doing something completely  different for Christmas this year appeals a great deal to me. Someting has happened to the family this year. Both my mum and dad's. Not just this year, specifically, it's been a long way coming. But I feel it more now than I used to. I want  to believe it's because I've  changed. And it probably is. But there's been a few major turning points somewhere along this particular year too.

Sometimes being alive weirdly resembles being asleep.               I keep wishing I was awake.                 And yet -                        I love to dream.

©️Sylvilel For those of you who don’t know, once upon a time I spent the better part of ten years dealing with depression. In the last three years of that depression I also dealt with anxiety, paranoia, and panic attacks. Long story short, I had problems taking care of myself in a satisfying way, and I drove everyone away from me. This December it will be two years since I was released from therapy. It’s been a good and productive two years, and I feel like I’m finally looking at an endgame where I get my shit together. I’m doing the stuff I like, and making choices based on what’s best for ME rather than for others. This March I had a bit of a setback, to the point where I considered going back into therapy. But as my therapist always told me: “You’ve got the tools, and you know how to use them.” So I decided to try another strategy first, one that pretty much worked for me since I was a kid: Namely writing. The journal you see in the photo has been my therapeuti