Capulus Immortalem

Stemmesurret fløt gjennom hodet mitt mens jeg lot filla gli over disken i store, bedagelige sirkler. Lytta til Foy Vance som sang lavt over anlegget; til latteren, småpratet, livet. Snuste inn lukta av folk på farta; av oppvaskmiddel, lakkert tre og kaffebønner.

Et seigt smil bredte seg på leppene mine.

Jeg gløtta opp på veggen, som jeg ofte gjorde. På svart-hvitt bilder av kaianlegg som for lengst var revet eller bygd ut; av biler med kromfelger; damer med hansker og menn med kasjett. Av servitør-team gjennom tidene. Av den gamle kaffekverna til farfar, og farfar som smilende holdt i sveiva.

Seksti år med byens beste kaffe. Tjue av dem med meg bak disken. Grunnlagt av farfar i 1958. Først overtatt av fattern da farfar ble sjuk. Deretter av meg da fattern ble sjuk. Det begynte som en kuriositet, og forvandla seg kjapt til et monument. Bare for fem år sida vedtok bystyret byens eldste kaffebar som verneverdig.

Det sies at ting tar etter navnene man gir dem. Capulus Immortalem levde …

On being a little lost, and finding your way back

It's been a long time since I felt as run-down as I do now, so it's actually a little hard to admit that I'm not doing so well at the moment.

But I choose to view it as a symptom of a forward-moving process. Considering all the mental changes I've been through over a very short period, it would be ridiculous to think that my body woulnd't eventually catch up with the mental exhaustion.

So now it's evidently time to take a step back and let things run their course for while; let all the hard work process, and see what becomes of it.

Since I'm not at all a perfectionist/idealist (read: sarcasm), it's difficult to let go. I am really bad at letting go.

But some wise idiot apparently said that you should fake it 'til you make it.

Also, in nine days time I'm having another surgery on the arm that I broke last August, which isn't exactly mood-lifting. But that too is part of a growing-process (pun intended), and I've decided that all will be …


As I fly Between light and stars, The vastness in my heart;

Review: "Djevelhogget" by Tuva Tovslid

«Ada has lead around her ankles. That’s how it feels when she drags herself through the days.
Had she only known where she was headed, where she wanted to go.

Then she finds the book about Djevelhogget. A hard trip, both mentally and physically, lies ahead of her.»

A few months back, I recieved a request from author Tuva Tovslid about doing a reader review of her debut novel, "Djevelhogget," which I (the little attention-addict that I am) of course said yes to.


It needs to be said that I am often and almost always very sceptical about reading Norwegian debuts, for reasons I won't go into right now (we don't have all night.)

The last time I remember falling in love with a book after page two, was at the age of twelve, when I opened "Harry Potter And The Philosopher's Stone" for the first time. Wich in itself is a kind of magic that is hard to find, in my opinion.

That is what happened with "Djevelhogget."

The main reason for my immediat…

Remnants Of Black Minds: Excerpt

Sometimes I wonder if she ever really had any faith at all. Or if she just clung to what she professed to be her faith, because she wanted so badly for something to believe in.

I think it’s a default in all of us, to need something to anchor ourselves with; be it religion or people, a job, a cause. It all comes back to the clawing need to believe in something outside ourselves.

She sat in her huge, moss green plush chair, eyes glassy and distant. Her pale old-person-skin looked almost smooth under the rays of the afternoon sun. A faint reek of soap, urin and dust filled the room.

I watched her chest rise and fall every three seconds, slow and rasping. She could have been sleeping. She could have been dead. But no; she was ever so much alive just yet.

We sat in silence; me listening to the waning rythm of her life; she staring blankly into nothing. It was a comforting silence, and a sad one.

«I’m going soon,» she said. «You know that.» Her voice sounded like the rustle of gritty paper…

Tidbits #3

Currently reading:
Because WHAT is January without my good, longterm-friend, Skulduggery The Dead Skeleton Detective?

Recently finished reading: 
"In this lush fantasy, Lei is a member of the Paper caste, the lowest and most oppressed class in Ikhara. She lives in a remote village with her father, where the decade-old trauma of watching her mother snatched by royal guards still haunts her. Now, the guards are back, and this time it's Lei they're after--the girl whose golden eyes have piqued the king's interest.
Over weeks of training in the opulent but stifling palace, Lei and eight other girls learn the skills and charm that befit being a king's consort. But Lei isn't content to watch her fate consume her. Instead, she does the unthinkable--she falls in love. Her forbidden romance becomes enmeshed with an explosive plot that threatens the very foundation of Ikhara, and Lei, still the wide-eyed country girl at heart, must decide just how far she's willing to g…

Life And Other Worries #1


This trudge again.

Allright: So clearly, I am not doing as fine I wish. Right now, I'm not sleeping, because I'm brooding over people in my life, and my life.

I'm brooding over the fact that my roomate is very non-talkative, and I don't know how to deal with that, because I have never once in my life not been around people who didn't share thoughts and opinions in some form or other.

Now this might be because I have always been easily impressionable, and prone to letting others take the lead.

That's fine.

But I'm not anymore.

I'm brooding over how annoyed I sometimes get at people who always share their thoughts and opinions in some form or other, and how that is completely unfair, when I am the one who usually encourages them to.

I'm brooding over how people are constantly annoyed or mad or hurt by my direct way of talking, and how that often makes me the big bad wolf.

I'm brooding over the fact that when I try to be nice and a little ge…